As a kid, I constantly was amazed by the ease my father had to always have an answer. I had been struggling to even formulate a question or share an idea. Not even a half second later he was sharing a reaction reorganizing everything I had shared.

It simply was too impressive.

What I hadn’t understood then, was that what seemed to me like magic was the result of years of experience, work, and learning.

I continue to encounter people I admire for their ability to answer complicated questions in a fast, enlightening and useful way.

But I’ve changed my approach from amazement to seeking to understand the underlying patterns they are using and how.

Whatever method someone has learned, they will still apply them out of their own frame of reference, based on their own beliefs and values.

It’s that integration work that helped them learn to apply a new method, a new way of doing things.

Doing that work takes time and requires investment.

There hardly ever is a method that works as is, that doesn’t need learning, that doesn’t take time to be assimilated.

Based on this I’ve become very hesitant when others share ideas and methods telling me “it works”. Even more so, if the explanations they share don’t survive contact with reality.

The learning we do must feel applicable. If it doesn’t, nothing was taught.