The whole and its parts

The whole & its parts

Victims of our own decisions

Gaining clarity on the way we deal with our own decisions may not always be straightforward. That is because people may not see a decision in their action nor how their action impacts their environment. In such cases, their action includes letting go of some aspects of their ability to act.

There are the decisions we take, announce and act upon.

These are not only conscious decisions, they are also allowing our environment to be aware of them. These decisions take place within our relationships, even if they have been taken unilaterally. They may lead to discussions as well as to others seeking to hold us accountable.

There are the decisions we take and act upon without sharing them.

While these decisions are conscious they don’t take place within our relationships. Consequently, whenever they impact our environment a loss of trust can be expected as they shift the relationship and appear as a surprise.

And then, there are the decisions we don’t act upon.

Either because we don’t make ourselves aware of them or because we never come to a conclusion as to what to decide. Missing out on these decisions simply means that we let others decide for us.

These are decisions we let go of by forgetting to interact with others and assuming that as we don’t have any say in the decision we can’t act. It is leaving the authority to others.

Sometimes the assumption that whenever the authority to make a decision is with the other, leads to the belief that there is no possibility to influence the situation This is forgetting the relationship. While it may be that we can’t influence the decision, it doesn’t mean that making the other aware of our interest in the decisions or of our ability to contribute is meaningless.

If it has no other benefice than to learn that we can’t contribute, it still means that we involved ourselves in the decision process and confirmed our active participation in the relationship we are in.


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