The whole and its parts

The whole & its parts

Communication and social excuses

When time is the best excuse to state that one cannot take up an invitation, communication is the excuse most often used to explain problems in human relationships.

While there is no reason to deny that this is often true, it often is more of an excuse.

When the desired result doesn’t seem to be accessible, it is in human nature to search for an explanation that serves as a cause. Sometimes it is an excuse as a different answer wouldn’t seem to be socially acceptable. And sometimes it has become the answer people give themselves as a different answer could be too close to what would be perceived as a need to change.

Having no time is socially accepted and can be seen as proof of being busy, if not even important.

Misunderstandings, or challenges in communication in a complex world have become so common that it allows one to let go of finding a culprit beyond the complexity of communication itself. That the communication might have failed as neither of the parties was paying attention to the communication itself would be perceived as a social faux pas. Had the cause been that they were not engaged in the conversation would be considered selfish or ego-driven. And these are only two of many possible ways to inquire into misunderstandings.

Whatever the explanation or excuse, they make it easy to let go of inquiring into one’s contribution to the situation. Which in turn prevents any learning that would enable a different approach.







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