The more people talk about trauma, the greater the divorce between two streams.

There is one stream of thinking that looks at the pain trauma causes and sees those who experienced trauma as victims.

Another stream of thinking perceives trauma as a gift or awakening that is there to teach us something relevant to us.

These streams might simply lack the transformation element that connects both streams. That element is grief.

Trauma as an event connects us with pain. When this happens, our connection with the joy of life is interrupted. It is the end of something, causing the pain. It is the beginning of something different that establishes joy.

The transformation from pain to joy happens through grief. It may not last forever, it may be interrupted, but that is true for pain as well as joy.