When someone did something you appreciated, that contributed to your growth or that made things easier for you, do go ahead and praise them.

Think again if you are praising someone to reassure them, to avoid their frustration, or to create space for your feedback.

Praise might have become flattery.

Never underestimate the other person’s ability to sense the ambiguity in the praise you shared. When they understand that it is flattery instead, they will know that the intention was probably meant to be kind but also includes a hidden objective.

This is not about a single occurrence; it’s about being aware of one’s posture. It is paying attention to knowing one’s intention as a means of staying true to it.

Taking it too far can happen with quite a few traits. Other pairs that need to be balanced are for example: Learning without cherry-picking. Independence without isolation. Or passion without addiction.