There are emotions which cannot live aside one another at the same moment. Others can.

There is an idea that emotions should be exclusive. That’s were perfection is misleading us. And it is impacting our ability to connect and stay connected with one another.

If we weren’t able to hold anger and love at the same time, friendship would fall apart any time love would be confronted with anger. Appreciation is the force that allows anger to appear. It’s the case with a lot of appreciations just as well as with little appreciation. The way we deal with anger also depends on appreciation.

If we don’t care for the other we will not seek to keep the anger oriented towards what is happening and will let it transform love to hate.

It’s when we care for the other that we’ll stay attuned to the person and will focus the anger onto the behavior.

It’s the focus of love and anger which allow them to live aside one another. Love is oriented towards existence, that is the being of the person. Anger, on the other hand, is oriented towards the doing. It is what people do and how they behave that provokes anger.

Our ability to distinguish between what someone does and who she is allows us to hold love and anger at the same time.

It’s worth keeping that in mind the next time you sense love or anger.