The whole and its parts

The whole & its parts

Building confidence

Some people seek to build confidence through knowledge and skills. They identify with their competence and use it to give themselves a sense of control. They will find themselves at ease in any environment in which their competence can be applied and asked for. It gives them a sense of security to be able to have an answer. The answers they seek to have will be there to remove uncertainty.

Some people seek to build confidence through power. They found a way to either seem to be more powerful than others or to have control over others. They benefit from others being dependent on them or feeling dependent on them. They themselves then may easily become dependent on having that sense of power without noticing. Depending on the perspective, some will experience them as confident, others will experience them as lacking confidence if not anxious.

Others developed confidence by being accustomed to dealing with doubt. They focus on reducing uncertainty to a level they feel comfortable with and accept whatever doubt remains. They integrate it into their risk processing. They don’t identify themselves with the answer they can provide, that is, they don’t search for external validation. They find comfort and security within themselves. And are clear enough about the presence of doubt without needing to deny or reject it. And they don’t confuse confidence with feeling comfortable or feeling safe.

In essence, confidence is something very different within each of these groups.




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