In a comment somewhere on social media, people were discussing a new regulation in Germany. The main theme expressed was the quest to demonstrate anger as a means to prevent regulation.

Naturally, the discussion also brought arguments forward, most of which were expressed as statements, that is as truths. Others did help out with clarifications, that is with new statements stating what’s really true. Others shared their opinions explaining how existing values were being forgotten or put aside. And yet others helped by describing the situation people would be in, should the law be applied.

Everyone was contributing to the discussion with good intent. Everyone doing so from their point of view and with their own perception of the problem being addressed.

What nobody was doing though was to address a deeper issue. No one was questioning the plan to use anger to change the status quo.

People were relying on the idea that to vent their anger would make the problem go away. It’s a strategy that relies on someone else being willing to welcome that anger and react to it with attention and care. It builds on the idea that anger is the only option to be heard and have an impact.

In this case, the voice of care expressed itself with her experience. She shared that people will get used to the more work this regulation requires. It’s true, people will have to get used to it. But, what they had been struggling with was if they want to get used to it.

The care brought forward was kind. It also made the point that the discussion would have no impact. That what people want would not be heard.

It’s time to shift strategies and move away from anger as a strategy.

By getting used to anger, we are following an upwards spiral requiring people to express their anger louder and louder to be able to be heard. It’s the path to violence.

Better not get used to it.