When setting out to persuade someone else, the basic aim is to change the other person.

It’s the assumption that what we believe to be good for the other person is better than what the other person believes herself.

When it doesn’t work, the resulting frustration is often linked to a feeling of inability to control what the other person is doing.

The challenges we are encountering is to trust the other person’s judgment as well as to be persuaded enough by our proposal to know that it will be chosen if it is right for the other person.

Dealing with such a challenge requires the ability to distinguish between feeling rejected personally and having our proposition being rejected.