It’s useful to remember that when someone describes people as nice, it is according to their standards.
When they say, “you’ll like them,” they might have an idea of what you consider “nice people.” But there is no guarantee that you’ll agree.
They might be nice to them, as they have gotten used to the way they are.
Perceptions and references differ.
Everyone has his or her answer to this question. And quite often, the answer will depend on the context in which this …
Looking back, it is nice to feel satisfaction based on some achievements. However, whatever these achievements, what I’ll regret most are the …
In the introduction to his book “High Output Management,” Andrew S. Grove describes how the market changed and impacted Intel’s ability to …
Lately, I’ve regularly been traveling in Belgium, notably in an area called “Flanders Fields.” From 1914 to 1918, this area was a …
As a kid, I was often nervous. In her effort to support me, my mother would regularly make an audible sign when …
Essentially, there are two ways to adapt oneself. One is to adapt to the situation and others as it is experienced and …
It’s both. But in an individual’s reality, it depends on their perspective. It leads to either choosing the mistake or the lesson. …
It always astonishes me when people state that something isn’t acceptable. Usually, they do it once something has happened. It’s a reaction …
Claude, a young coachee, was disappointed. He had started his professional career a few months ago and somehow, nothing seemed to work …
Throughout one’s life, it is normal that we’ll find ourselves hurt by the words or actions of others. It happens. Rare is …
It may be one of the most limiting approaches to self. Imagine someone who identifies himself as being someone who avoids conflict. …
Whatever the situation, there will always be a problem. But what’s most interesting is what this problem is there for. Most often, …
It was a bit early for dinner, but we decided to settle in the bar area of the restaurant. Asking for a …
Indeed, there are many occasions on which it is wise to avoid sharing one’s thoughts, reactions, and ideas. Not everything needs to …
A potential client called me up telling me that he needed to enhance his leadership skills. Asking him how I could help …
The leader was frustrated. He noticed that one of his team members had started playing power games. This person didn’t seem willing …
One thing leaders have learned is that the things people gladly do are not always based on fun. What they often still …
Every day, leaders need to make decisions. One may assume that once a decision is made, it should stay as it is. …
In his book “Man’s Search for Meaning” Viktor E. Frankl suggests switching away from the meaning life could have for us. His …
Recently I found myself in an ideation exercise. The participants at my table jumped into a conversation and started to argue and …
Most often, failures become the validation that one isn’t good enough. Everyone worked hard and was well prepared, and yet, the project …
Any task one takes up comes with three lenses to analyze them. These are the what, why, and how of a task. …
One’s idea of leadership will often be based on the idea that leaders have the steering wheel in their hands. That is, …
One of the conversations I’m regularly confronted with questions the use of protocol. The way protocol appears, to those complaining about it, …
“I know that I know nothing” is a saying derived from Plato’s account of Socrates. It goes well with this saying that …
A lot has been written about prioritization, suggesting that it is necessary to be successful. A story attributed to Warren Buffet describes …
Most people live with some kind of structure. It’s as easy as getting up in the morning, having a plan of what …
Results are how progress becomes visible. The result as such is neutral. It is only through its context that it can be …
For years we’ve been taught to define goals for ourselves. The idea was that such goals would be motivating and would create …
In his Steppenwolf Hermann Hesse wrote, “Learn what is to be taken seriously and laugh at the rest.” Working with a young …
The idea of self-development is widely accepted today, but for many, it has morphed into an expectation. This might still be fine. …
When someone takes the time to criticize an organization it’s to be expected that they have been disappointed by something. But what’s …
A way to think about acceptance is to by disconnecting it from the change one seeks to make. Acceptance then can become …
One may argue that certainty isn’t attainable. But is it the point? And what is it that invites resistance when uncertainty appears? …
As circumstances change, uncertainty may seem to become overwhelming. But one reason uncertainty becomes overwhelming is our sense that known solutions will …
As we imagine the incredible amount of information, we humans are confronted with, it is interesting to imagine how much of that …
Whenever the plan is to create something, it helps to remember that the outcome can’t be predicted. The work is to discover …
A few days ago, I was playing golf with some colleagues. One of the members of our flight explained that his whole …
Communication and relationships are informed by individual perceptions of the other. It’s a very simple and basic, if not archaic, perception. The …
Consider the choices you can make. Remember that choices are not outcomes. Notice how there is almost no limitation to the choices …
Within the many facets of communication, there is diversity in how distant and connected people feel and how this changes. Eric Berne, …
Communication is one of the most important competencies leaders can develop. But relationship asks for more than communication. The even more important …
A somewhat simplistic idea is that a goal needs to be clear and measurable. It’s actually an interesting challenge to capture what …
In an interview more than 10 years ago Ashoka CEO Bill Drayton explained that “The old paradigm for successful growth was to …
Yes, it does. But, not to everyone. Interestingly, truth matters to liars. It matters to them, as they seek ways to conceal …
Being an optimist as well as being a pessimist are two different ways to relate to a given situation. One may assume …
In many situations, a person’s role is evident. But what is it that makes a role evident? Most often status symbols. As …
Whatever one does, it always comes with two objectives. One is the short-term objective; the other is the long-term objective. The challenge …
Coming back from a weekend spent with colleagues and friends I wondered if it was worth it. The people were nice, the …
When two computers seek to connect and exchange data, they always start with a short protocol that establishes the connection. Those remembering …
Once someone believes in praise, he will find himself wondering about criticism. Someone who believes in criticism needs to think about praise. …
When people come together, they often assume that everyone thinks like them about the event or the meeting. For them there is …
I’ll often find myself coming out of a conversation wondering what it has been about. The conversation might have been fun, it …
One of the famous stories about Charlie Munger has been reported by Warren Buffet as follows: “Charlie, as a very young lawyer, …
Steve Jobs is supposed to have shared the following: “You’ve got to find what you love. And that is as true for …
Several years ago, Jeff Bezos was asked how he manages work-life balance for himself. To answer, he started explaining how he made …
When sports become games, they can become a learning experience. If one makes oneself aware of the possible lessons. One of the …
It’s possible to look at a problem and discover how it can be described as a business problem as well as a …
They may not always be distinguishable, and that’s normal. A way to think about them is in terms of the objective and …
For many, it’s easy to beat themselves up anytime the result doesn’t correspond to what they expected or hoped for. It may …
There are two truths about errors: They happen, and the world moves on once it happened. What defines us is how we …
The more I read about immigration, the more I realize how outdated my experience growing up is. When I look back at …
Innovations come and go. But they never disappear. They change. And they are changed. Thus, they never reappear as they were. …
When I think about it, I notice how difficult it is to pinpoint it. Asked if I feel safe, I’ll be able …
To step out of one’s comfort zone it is necessary to feel comfortable with such a move. When one is outside of …
A sentence I hear often in Germany is “wie kann ich ihn abholen?” Literally “How can I pick him up?” The idea …
When focusing on one’s desire for harmony, it rarely emerges. That’s because much of one’s thinking will be focused on the risk …
Much of what we know seems to be something everybody else knows too. We share a language, and the words I’m using …
In today’s blog post, David duChemin reflected on the difference between a sighting and a scene. In his terms, a sighting is …
When I started to think about and engage in mindfulness practices, I wasn’t sure what to expect. There was a lot of …
The Encyclopædia Britannica describes Checks and Balances as a “principle of government under which separate branches are empowered to prevent actions by …
A feature of relationships is that they are and that at the same time, they are constantly changing. The most impactful change …
In life, some aspects of our identity cannot be changed. Whatever has been an element of history will remain a part of …
Sometimes I meet people in my coaching practice who are very clear about how others should have reacted. They share the details …
As far as I can remember, I’ve never experienced complete silence. However, I often hear silence. Sometimes it is disturbing. But that’s …
In “The Great Dictator” Chaplin cast himself in two roles: the fascist dictator (“Adenoid Hynkel”) and a Jewish barber. In the final …
One of life’s challenges is to realize how being unique is continuously shaped by one’s history and that fitting in has nothing …
It’s certainly not new that even though there are times when “life shouldn’t be like that” it is like it is. It’s …
The ability to measure something often creates a sense of scientific validity. It makes it easy to compare and gives the impression …
When teams work well with one another, it is always noticeable that there is some presence of structure. It may not always …
The work an individual does is not enough to make oneself irreplaceable. It’s who one is that makes one irreplaceable. Being irreplaceable …
Words have a variety of meanings. While subtle, they may shift the way one thinks. Such meaning can differ for example on …
A simple question. And yet an impactful one. What do you love about the project you are engaged in right now? What …
Sometimes, we will find ourselves stuck. As much as we try to understand something, find an answer, or decide, we continuously reach …
The desire to have one answer one may trust is tremendous. Having that answer would make uncertainty go away. In the past …
To ask for something? To infer a call for action? To ask for advice? To ask for driving directions? To get information? …
A few days ago, I was listening to a presentation. It was a worthy cause: helping children grow up. I liked the …
A problem with quotes is that they are taken out of context. It distorts their simple truth. Their truth is based on …
Anxiety highlights something that is known and troubling. In doing so, it shifts the target of our attention away from what is …
People like to know. It seems to be a good way to deal with uncertainty. But it also is how we are …
In a recent post, Seth defined process as “the investment we make in inefficiency now to prevent errors from costing us later.” …
A moment of most intense attention I remember happened while holding my grandson. He was just a few months old and had …
Human beings are social beings. Whatever happens, at some stage, the desire to feel connected to a group and experience belonging will …
One of the challenging tasks in coaching is deciding what questions to ask. That challenge is true for the coachee as much …
Most often the invitation to “unlock your potential” is more about selling some new knowledge than about unlocking potential. It doesn’t mean …
One of the themes I see most often discussed on my LinkedIn newsfeed is linked to leaders. Many of these articles point …
It’s regularly astonishing to me when I notice an ad that invites me to grab an unfair advantage. Observing a conversation unfold …
The coach laid down a ball about a cm away from the hole and asked his client to put it into the …
When I was thinking about a blog post I wanted to write, I encountered the saying “The single biggest problem in communication …